Pimping

Posted: January 31, 2015 in Uncategorized

BlastofWinter

Terrestial, old-fashioned, non-streaming radio is still around for two reasons: Commuting. And the fact that radio companies keep a ruthless eye on costs.

They use a variety of techniques to hold down the cost of programming. Much of the local programming on stations owned by iHeartmedia, the largest U.S. radio company, actually originates at its headquarters in San Antonio, Texas, from where it flows out for insertion into the transmission spectrums of local stations around the country. It’s an artful simulation, with weather cut-ins and even traffic reports used to create the pretense of a large staff of dedicated people working tirelessly to serve the local listener. But many of their smaller stations are staffed entirely by DJs who have never visited the town from which they are broadcasting.

The largest complement of people in a local radio station works in ad sales. A large station with a strong format might have five…

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Flights are filled these days with workers heading to industry conferences. As a public service to you first-time conference-goers, and as a refresher for those who have been unable to attend in recent years, what follows is a rundown of what you are likely to encounter.

Brainiac Futurist. Typically a keynote speaker, the Brainiac Futurist (or BF), proclaims that “everything has changed.” He or she is a high priest of the digerati. Their holy book is a small device of silicon and metal, encased in plastic. All that emanates from the holy book is revealed truth. The world is flat—or “horizontal”—and you need to “get it.” Some in the audience will be hypnotized by this astounding insight and become practicing disciples of the new creed. Though the BF is an industry intellectual, the smartest person in the grand ballroom, BF is incapable of recognizing the mental straightjacket of this ideology.

Swagger Man. A staple of industry conventions—usually in breakout sessions— Swagger Man does not use the podium. He roams the stage and beyond, thundering like a one-man buffalo herd. Enthusiasm is his game, and he is pinned with a lapel-mike even though his bellowing voice can pierce the best soundproofing without electronic enhancement.  Rambling amidst the audience as he speaks, you notice bits of spittle occasionally launching from this mouth, arcing through the air as he pontificates. His testosterone level is off the charts. Fix your gaze on your notepad and appear to be writing down his words of wisdom. Do not make eye contact, lest he wrap you into an impromptu verbal exchange.   

Hip Cool Guy. He is young, though his attire reminds you of the 1960’s counterculture. He is either bald wearing a t-shirt and sporting an earring, or wears jeans with his unfashionably long hair and boots. HCG is has more money than you, having cashed in on some trend in modern commercial culture that bypassed you. He tells you that you need to shape up or be tossed aside in the dustbin of history alongside the other “underperformers.”

All Other Speakers. You can relax. The AOS wrap the podium in a death-grip, reading the prepared script for their PowerPoints. Monotone, dull, they lull you into a calming stupor. No risk here. Download their slide decks later.

The conference will have a cocktail reception in the evening where you drink and nosh while socializing with attendees in a captive state. Among the personalities to avoid at the reception, or dodge at the hotel lobby bar later, include the following:

Barrister Bob, a man who knows all the legal and regulatory jargon of your industry and will explain the latest developments in excruciating detail after consuming the first round of appetizers and drinks. If captured by him you can excuse yourself to the nearest restroom as a refuge.

Donna the Dangerous is an executive on the move. She is attractive and dresses a little too young for her (middle) age. She starts the conversation by asking, “Tell me something new.” It is not a question, it is a command. Under no circumstances tell her anything new or you will be unwillingly dragged into her network of informants. And you know what eventually happens to informants.

Larry Looselips is a bit overweight, wears eyeglasses and has a buzzcut. Larry is the most genial person at the reception. He drinks too much and he tells everyone embarrassing personal stories about his vast array of industry friends. Laugh at his jokes but be a contrasting tight-lip.

And there you have it. So put that tray table in its full upright and locked position. Adjust the seat belt low and tight across your lap. You’re in for a bumpy ride.

 

Y. A.  Feretovic is the chief innovation officer for Intensity Enlightenment, a global enterprise engaging leading-edge thinkers through the use of robust, multiplatform digital toolsets that transforms the paradigm in disrupted business ecosystems.

The pen is a sword. And words to die for.

Argument over poetry vs. prose leads to stabbing death in Russia

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/jan/29/russian-friend-argument-poetry-prose

Aside  —  Posted: January 30, 2014 in Uncategorized

Which do you value, privacy or convenience? Who do you trust?

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/when-big-data-marketing-becomes-stalking/

Aside  —  Posted: January 29, 2014 in Uncategorized

Though it has receded in our minds since the days of the Cuban Missile Crisis, when we practiced duck-and-cover, the ugly prospect of mistakes remains.

The odd reality of Dr. Strangelove.

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/newsdesk/2014/01/strangelove-for-real.html

Aside  —  Posted: January 29, 2014 in Uncategorized

Farming is dangerous work. Machinery, livestock and weather can cause any number of dicey situations.

http://www.salon.com/2014/01/28/german_barn_explosion_caused_by_90_farting_cows/

Aside  —  Posted: January 29, 2014 in Uncategorized